WHAT IS TIME ?
THE FUTURE IN A PAST TENSE
Once upon a time in the not to distant future things were about to change. Needless to say because things had not yet happened it was actually quite difficult to predict when these changes would occur. But the future was prepared.
Or so it thought !
It is quite difficult to ascertain when time travel was first invented. Some say it was first used as far back as 529ad .by Monks of the order of Saint Benedictus. And it was these Benedictine Monks who travelled to the future to instruct the future young initiates of the order how to time travel and as a way of saying thank you the future Monks gave the Monks from the past digital watches and mobile phones. Some of the Monks from the past chose to stay in the future and fully embrace all the technological advances in this future time. And some stayed in the future just to binge watch the complete Star Trek compilation.
However it soon became apparent that this was not a tenable situation and quite soon paradoxes came into play and throw the future into doubt because what was was supposed to be a future event that had not yet happened was suddenly being recorded in history books as an event that had already occurred. It also became clear that the past was now being inferred to as an event that was waiting to happen in the future and we would now have to wait for the past events to happen.
There is a picture in the Sistine Chapel that is not available for public scrutiny which is alleged to show a group of 6th century monks sat around a 72inch HD TV watching Star Trek some of these monks appear to be wearing digital watches. But what is responsible for creating more confusing paradoxes is the fact that in the future some of these monks chose not to be monks and one initiate actually met himself and talked himself into becoming as financial advisor rather than a monk. He took his knowledge of investments and financial planning back to the past and made an absolute killing on selling predated future investment portfolio’s to 6th century monks who then travelled to the future to cash in their investments and chose not to return back to a life of quiet contemplation and austerity.
So it appeared that one day in the future the the order of Saint Benedictus ceased to exist. A rescue plan was put into place Benedictine monks from the 6,7 and 8th centuries were offered roles in the future to rekindle the spirit of Benedictus. Thus the order was saved. But what of the past ? Well it would seem that the paradoxical nature of time travel caused a lot of young initiates not to be born or in some cases become their own father. So all knowledge of Benedictus disappeared and it was proven never to have existed at all which then negated the the future order of the monks and what was supposed to have happened never did Well it did happen but that was a very long time ago and their is little or no recollection of it ever happening at all. Which then proves without doubt that one day in the future time travel was a thing of the past.
Once upon a time there was no time. Then there was and it started with a bang.
Steve Hawkins turning up too late for his own Birthday party
Time is an irrelevance we could well do without. Because if there was no time you would never be late for that job interview. Or indeed too early for your own funeral.
If you could travel back or forward in time where would you go? Me ! oh most definitely go back to where it all began the big bang.
One of the most fundamentally disturbing and as yet unanswered questions on the subject of time is.
“Does time fly by when your a driver of a train. Well here’s video evidence to prove that indeed time does fly by when your a driver of a train.
THE FUTURE IS A PAST EVENT JUST WAITING TO NOT HAPPEN.
One day in the future time travel will have been a thing of the past, and in the future where they are running out of time the present will be a stop off for time travelers from the future who may have predicted the demise of the universe, because in the past time travel may not yet have been invented thus creating confusing paradoxes that may inadvertently mean that you become your own great grandfather. Even though you have yet to be born. This is why time travel from the future will have been banned in the past to ensure that in the future time travel will be a thing of the past.
At present if you wanted to travel to the past you would have to travel to the future because time travel as not yet been invented, which in itself creates confusing paradoxes which could lead to you meeting your self before you were born at a place you have yet to visit. So we are led to believe that in an attempt to prolong the life of the universe ( as time was running out ) time travelers from the future came to the past in a misguided attempt to get extra time from the present but unfortunately this led to the early demise of the universe as the present suddenly ran out of time and the universe as we know ceased to exist. So then it became apparent that future time travelers would have to visit the past so they could invent time travel a lot earlier than it should have been ( which again creates confusing and non existent parallel time lines) thus allowing people from the past where time travel as not yet been invented to travel to the present and meet relatives who had yet to be born and also to ensure there is enough time left ensure that the universe continues to exist.
Can one exist without the other. When cause and causation come into play we become aware that just as a natterjack toad cannot drive a car then so it must be that one day time will run out and the universe will be no more.
Light travels very fast, much faster than the number 59 bus which by some strange twist of the laws of physics is always late. Even when the route is road works free. So if the number 59 bus could travel at the speed of light would it turn up before it set off which in itself would be no use to passengers because they would get to where they wanted to be before they knew they wanted to be there. Which would create such paradoxical confusion as to people turning up to meet friends who were not aware that such meetings had yet been organized. So time and the universe are one and the speed of light exists as a constant that binds the two inexorably together.
So there you have it at present time travel is not possible, in the future, but due to past events being compromised by people inadvertently traveling to past time zones one day in the future time travel will be a thing of the past.
THE AARDVARKSKETTLE 